How To Read These Bleeping Articles

Listed below are some guidelines to reading the Vulgar Philosopher series, other Caprigonian work, and literary works in general. The idea here is not to insult the reader's intelligence. If you've already noticed these dynamics, good for you! This will be short so it wont take up much of your precious time. Perhaps, there might be a small gem of insight buried in all of the “crap” you already know so indulge me by reading this anyway.

Writing Style

The Vulgar Philosopher series will be written in multiple styles liberally “mushed” together. An attempt will be made to use formatting and transitions to help sort out how each section will be employed. Common styles found in these works will include conversational, informal, journalistic, formal, and, if I'm not too lazy, scholarly with proper citations. I may even use writing styles which have previously never existed so brace your self!

Capitalized Words

As you are reading through the Vulgar Philosopher series, hopefully waiting anxiously for the next volume, you will not that some words are in all caps. These capitalized words will be conspicuously out of place. The reason for this is so that you, the reader, can participate in the article by deciding which FREEZING words are more appropriate. I'm confident that you will do a commendable, as a opposed to a SHINNING, job determining which words are suitable. A random word generator may be used, if I fell like it, which may make your duty as the reader a bit challenging but I'm SMACKING sure you will do SMUDGING great.

I have faith in you reader!


Much of this may be written in a (somewhat pretentious) first person conversational manner, like this one, because it's easier to draw the reader in by making it personal. However, multiple strategies will be employed so more formal styles employing third person omnipotent perspective are likely to be found in this series as well. The level of pretension involved will go “off the charts” when I resort to scholarly and formal styles because they are pretentious styles; when one writes in such a manner, one must pretend to be an omnipotent omniscient sage.

It's pretty ridiculous if you think about it but I digress….


One could argue that conversational styles are even more emotionally manipulative because they tend to employ tactics like forced teaming but all this demonstrates is that writing in general is, to a large extent, about influencing people's emotions. The difference between Caprigonian work, and other work, is that I'm not going to harbor any delusions that writing is somehow not dangerous and mind-controlling in nature nor will I attempt to instill such delusions in the reader. Writing, whether it be fiction or non-fiction, actually shapes our perceptions of reality so, if indirectly, creates our social reality.

If you have any doubt about what I'm saying, keep in mind that all our movies and televisions shows have to be written. This is the most obvious example of how writing shapes our reality through our perceptions. Have you even been able to effectively communicate philosophical ideas with people without referencing pop culture? I haven't. I don't even try. When discussing philosophy, of any kind, the tendency is to make references to Star Wars and the Matrix instead of any real-world examples or more archaic parables like Aesop's fables.


  • Multiple writing styles will be employed in the Vulgar Philosopher series.
  • They should still be easy to read through the implementation of transitions and formatting.
  • Certain words will be written in all capital letters prompting the reader to replace the words in their mind.
  • Different perspectives will be used to create different psychological effects.

If you have found it difficult reading this SHIP, it may be inadvisable for you to read any more of my FISHING articles. Please feel free to read Nancy Drew and Hardy Boys novels instead. Start with that STICK, why don't you? That's the sort of work I enjoyed as a child in elementary school so, if you're currently too STOPWATCH to read this or any other non-fiction, just learn to FLUSHING enjoy reading in general first.

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