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Mystic Brain Flatulence – Self Service as Service to Others

Someone posted some Alex Gray artwork. Naturally, that got my attention because his work is incredible. However, attached to it was a long explanation, attributed to him, discussing the importance of self-love but when he tried to tie that to co-dependency I felt like it missed the mark entirely. It could be that I didn’t fully understand what he was trying to get across because of a difference of definitions or whatnot but I found myself shacking my head and disagreeing very much based on my recent experiences and revelations. I found myself belting out the following spiel…

My Take On Self Love

I don't agree with that assessment at all. Not taking anything away from Alex Grey's art, which is a comprehension of a different sort, you can never be content or respect yourself unless you live to serve others. Co-dependancy is an issue where neither party is serving the other but rather feeding off each others negative traits. It's totally different.

If you find yourself being used because you are ”[loving] the other person before yourself” you have to consider that you aren't serving them either because you are being an enabler. You don't serve others by letting them walk all over you.

For example, if you are in a relationship with someone with a drug problem and they wont quit, if you keep enabling them you aren't serving them; you are serving yourself. You are actually doing them a great dis-service by helping them continue their negative behaviors and for what? So you can play the victim?

Co-dependent relationships aren't about one person being too selfless; they are about both people being too selfish. You are reinforcing behavior patterns that are actually destructive to them. [This is not a way to love another or one’s own self.]

Putting others first is how you put yourself first. You have to take care of your health sure, but you do this because you know you can better serve others. The whole point is service to others because that is the only way to truly serve the self. The self will never be satisfied any other way.

This may be what has confused many of us for so long. We think we are serving others, out of love, when really we are serving the self in unhealthy ways. We try to serve the self and only end up with no respect for the self and benefit no one. This is not the way of love.

You have to live to serve others or your life will be an empty shell. You will just ride life’s rollercoaster without any reason or purpose beyond a shallow superficial vacancy. When you are a young child, you develop your ego. As you grow into adulthood, you have to turn out toward the world and try to make it a better place, even if for a few people you can affect, or the world will turn in toward you and make of you what it will.

How many years of wasted life must one live before one learns this important reality?

“So long as you can sweeten another's pain, life is not in vain.” –Helen Keller.

Analysis

I know there is wisdom in there. I don’t claim ownership of it, though it was channeled through me. I felt it flow through me like light through a prism. I only hope that I am a lens not so cloudy that the message was lost. Somewhere in there is virtue; I only hope it can be easily found.


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