Dating in the Workplace

These days we are all preoccupied with work, success and money, so personal affairs are the aspect of our lives we pay little attention to. Dating it’s hard on its own and when you add the little free time you have left after work, the complexity of interpersonal relationships and the modern perspective we have on love, finding a partner gets even harder. No one wants to lose and get hurt, so most of us tend to wait for the most suitable mate to appear. But when you don’t have the time to get out to meet a potential soul mate, the only available playground is the workplace. Dating in the workplace is the best idea and the worst idea at the same time, depending on the outcome of the entire situation. But then again, that is true for every relationship, whether happens in the office or elsewhere. The saying states that you shouldn’t mix work with pleasure, but sometimes that mix may turn out to be the perfect option.

The Pros of Dating in the Workplace

Professionals today spend most of their day in the workplace. Hours and hours every week spent with your coworkers may sometimes get you closer to them than to your own family. Then one day, a drink after work will lead to sharing a cab or walking you to your apartment and suddenly, the setting reminds of an actual date. Dating a coworker is easier than dating a complete stranger, especially if you’ve worked with them for a long time. You get to know their likes and dislikes, their personal traits and see their real faces during an office dispute before you become intimately involved. Knowing your partner and his character before you become intimate takes a lot of pressure off the relationship because you don’t get to be unpleasantly surprised later. When you meet someone new, you have absolutely no idea what their private life looks like. Not that you know your colleagues all that well, but you certainly know much more about their individual qualities, interests, ethics and principles. Another great thing about dating a coworker is the fact that you can see them whenever you want. Usually we are either too busy or too tired to see our loved ones every day, so we limit the time for personal pleasure to a date night or only weekends. When your honeybun is right across the hall, you can see them anytime your heart desires. That way you get to see your sweetheart all the time and still have time left for friends and family reunions.

Cons of Dating in the Workplace

This seeing each other business will seem great at the beginning, but after a while the same factor might break the relationship. Keep in mind that you will be together at least 8 hours every day, five days a week, so your relationship might become a little dull. You may not be able to see the excitement you felt when you first started dating, so it will be best to wear your professional suit during your working hours. Consider it a game. When you wear your business suit, you and your sweetheart are only coworkers. There are no lovey-dovey looks and no text messaging. If you usually had lunch together, change that too. Take your break with someone else, with whom you can catch on the latest gossip or discuss business matters. If you and your colleagues have a habit of whispering in front of the water cooler about the newbies in the company and their looks, that could change too. Someone can easily overhear your bawdy comments or even worse, let it slip in front of your girlfriend, which will probably get you in a lot of trouble. And at the end, you can never know how the relationship will go. You may be in love, get married and have a bunch of babies, but you may also find your partner incompatible and break off the whole thing. You probably don’t want to see your ex on the street, but this way you will be forced to spend time together every day. If you can handle the breakup like grownups, that will be perfect. It will be better to discuss the potential outcomes before you jump into the relationship in the first place. It might be awkward to discuss the ending of something that is new and undeveloped, but it will be better to know where you stand from the start. The worst case scenario is you having to leave a job you love, just for the sake of keeping the peace at work.

Rules of Dating in the Workplace

Some companies have a “no dating coworkers” policy, but even if these types of interactions are tolerated in your office, it will be best to lay low. Donald Trump is known as one of the most influential businessmen in our era and he warns professionals to avoid mixing business with pleasure. He said that dating in the workplace is distracting, disturbing, people don’t like it and it is never good for the company. Other CEO’s say that love relationships within company walls may actually strengthen the entire foundation and create a family atmosphere. Regardless of how your office takes these matters, it would be still wiser to keep your private life private. For one, you can’t praise your partner in front of your colleagues when everyone knows you are dating, because it seems subjective. Even if they did a great job, you will have to keep quiet, which might become frustrating down the road. Two, if one of you gets a promotion, the things will get very complicated. Both of you may think it’s sexy to date the boss at first, but soon you will realize that bossing your lover around is not the perfect love scenery. Showing affection in the office is extremely delicate subject. Even if everyone says you look cute and adorable, the truth will actually be discussed behind your backs. All things considered, if you still fall in love with a coworker you will have to be discreet. You can never know if the owner, manager or supervisor will appreciate your special friendship, so make sure you both always act like coworkers only.

Dating Your Boss

Whether you are the boss and want to date someone from your staff, or you have been wooed by your superior, romance with a person in charge is a huge taboo in the business world. There are companies in which you may get sued for such romances, others will request a transfer, but there are few that may not take interest in your personal life. If your company is liberal on the subject of dating a superior, you will still have to take some steps to protect yourself and your reputation. The corporate world is a competitive stage and unfortunately, many people will date the boss to help their career. Even if this is not your motivation, your coworkers will perceive your relationship in that manner. Even if your relationship grows stronger, you love each other and plan to get married, the connection will still ruin your career prospects. At any given point you may earn a promotion, but not actually get it to save your loved one from favoritism accusations. Another important aspect to take into consideration while dating your boss is the rest of your relationships in the office. If one person knows you are the woman behind the man, everyone else will know by lunch time. After that, you can never rely on anyone, professionally and personally. Personally, you can’t really know who is really friendly and who is faking smiles, just so you spread the word to their superior. Professionally, this type of love involvement will most probably ruin your reputation. These are the type of things some individuals in the business world hope for to happen, so whether you are working harder than everyone else or not, you will always get the wrong end of the stick.

You can always choose with your head, but your heart knows what feels best. We are all looking for love, but if you find it in the workroom make extra precautions to protect your feelings and your career. Dating in the workplace is tricky, exciting and dangerous. Before you make a big deal out of everything, search your heart and see if it’s not just a crush. Our working environments are already stressed as it is, so adding love frustrations will be a little too much for everyone. If you still want to pursue a love relationship with a coworker, make sure you establish a firm friendship first. A friendship where you are familiar with the personal values of the other, and you are not afraid of their future actions and behavior if your love efforts go to waste. If you are old enough to look for true love, you are old enough to talk like a fully developed individual. So use your words to make sure your career won’t suffer because of your love life and vice versa.

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